Is it possible to really prepare yourself to spend three months in a part of the world completely foreign to you? Is it possible to really be spiritually ready to serve the Lord on a scale that feels so much bigger than daily life?
I'm hopeful that I shouldn't truly feel prepared...because I don't.
I know that the Lord uses brokenness. I know that it is not through my own efforts that I accomplish spiritual goals. I know that my life is not an endless cycle of trying to prove my worth to Him.
And yet, sometimes "knowing" something just doesn't connect with my heart.
It's all feeling a little bit big and overwhelming at the moment - to get on a plane in the morning - one that takes off exactly 12 hours from now - will be a huge step of trust and faith. I pray that I will be faithful by God's grace.
Fearful? No. Anxious. Slightly.
"Cast all your anxiety on Christ, for He cares for YOU." 1 Peter 5:7
Prayer.
Excited? Definitely.
Tomorrow begins a unique pressure-cooker time of growth for me. I'm trying not to give God a laundry list of every weakness that I see and expect Him to "work on" while I'm in Thailand. He knows my weaknesses before He called me, and He still invites me to be a part of what He is doing for His glory in Thailand. He will lead me in exactly the way I should grow if I can only seek my deepest joy in being with Him.
"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33
Tomorrow also begins a walk into a world different culturally, linguistically, gastronomically, religiously...essentially every way possible. I can't wait to learn new things, see new sights, hear new sounds, taste new foods...feel new feelings. And yet the most intrinsic thing in my life - the One True Holy God - remains the same no matter where I go.
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever." Hebrews 13:8
Hi Baby, I miss you already! I just wanted to tell you again that I am praying for you! I know that God will use this as one more step in perfecting your faith. It's trust and obey - you've said yes to what God placed before you. I know that you have prepared as much as possible but it will be this same exercise over and over again in the days to come. Remember that He will supply all your needs according to His glorious riches - you just keep trusting and obeying!! I can't wait to hear. Love you - Mom
ReplyDeleteOh Laura! You are on the journey of a lifetime and I can't wait to hear all that God is going to do in and through you. I will be praying for you in your "hometown" of Fairview Alpha, Louisiana! Mrs. Marilyn (Momee) gave me this scripture to read several years ago on my trip to Brazil and it has become one of my favorite...Psalm 34. I'll be praying vs. 7 for you..."that the angel of the Lord will encamp all around you who fear Him and He will deliver you!"
ReplyDeleteLove in Christ,
Jana Endris